Thursday, April 14, 2011

Where to find me!

I am here! Subscribe and join the forum, we learn and grow from others!

Thursday, March 17, 2011

And the tears come...

Before I start this post, I want to quickly thank everyone who posted on my comp pics! One lady was given a pro-card (it wasn't me) but I was very happy with my condition and will be hitting the stage again this weekend.... more on all this later when my comps are all done, I just want to share other things today....

I posted about 'Going my own way'. Well, back on this topic. Wednesday morning I put my I-pod on and on my run, I ran past the venue of my dads wake (or Celebration of Life) as we called it. With the song playing I was overwhelmed and in the dark sobbed like a baby unable to see where I was stepping. I wont say sobbed, I howled. I have been feeling very vulnerable this week (as we all do sometimes) and remembering driving into the venue with my dads ashes on the seat next to me, which I had brought almost 3000 miles all the way from Singapore, combined with a song that reminded me of him and we used to sign off with at his Celebration, brough the raw emotion I thought I had lost back. I recalled speaking in front of a couple hundred people at the Celebration, what I had to say about him, being in Singapore, finding him in bed, seeing him go into the infernery, being handed his bones (not his ashes) and not knowing what to do. I recalled his laugh, his hug (or more his grip as I fondly remember it as because it was more like a headlock or a tackle around the shoulders) and his smile (which I defientely inherited). And whilst going through a vulnerable week, I try and think what he would tell me.

He will always be my strength and I need him right now. Today I am sourcing it and I will find it.

Friday, March 4, 2011

Mind Sweat @ FitX

Come and visit Nicky and I at the Mind Sweat stand at FitX.

Saturday 12th March to Sunday 13th March
Melbourne Convention & Exhibition Centre

Mind Sweat is an online publication and forum designed to entertain and inspire. We explore genres including: fitness, nutrition, travel, politics, fashion, lifestyle, finance, current affairs, motivation, business; the list limited only by what we believe will evoke your opinion. Mind Sweat will encourage you to evolve and challenge your thoughts.

Come and register to subscibe for FREE to Australia's newest online resource for women for your chance to win a gorgeous gift pack. :)

We hope to see you there! x


Come and support me competing!!! Show starts at 10.00am on Saturday, I am in Figure Open which is the 4th line up!

Tuesday, March 1, 2011

M/Y "Sam"

From one of my favourite lyricists.

And it can get rough out there I know,
But a woman is a sail that remains unfurled,
So stay ahead of the wind man, or you won't catch her.
Josh Pyke - Lines on Palms -

Mind Sweat is coming!

Thursday, February 24, 2011

You Can Go Your Own Way

This Fleetwood Mac song we played at the end of my dad’s Wake. Ordinarily, any of the songs we choose bring tears, but last week I stepped outside at 4.50am, put my iPod on and choose this song to start my 1hr run, I wanted to feel that raw emotion that comes over me when I think of dad as 'gone'. As I ran down the first street in complete darkness, I was expecting to be struggling to see through the usual tears and squinting while I watched the pavement. Instead, I was thinking of fond memories of the man I view as symbolising ultimate strength and self belief. My memories taking me to a time when I would have been somewhere around 8 years old.

At first I felt cold as ice because no tears came, had I really lost all emotion over loosing dad? Until I realised that it wasn’t that. You Can Go Your Own Way was chosen because dad always did what he wanted to or believed he could do. I realise these last 6 months have taken me on a journey to following my own dreams. I feel like I am finally 'going my own way'. Instead of feeling sad, I was thinking how happy I was that I was becoming that vision of ultimate strength and self belief that I respect and dad is actually in me.

This morning I again played this song as my first, second and third tracks to start my run. I feel strong. I am going my own way, big changes have been made and my future is positively exciting.